Have you ever reflected upon the countless times during the day where critical thoughts and harsh words, in your direction, appear to be normal? For many of us, this choice of behaviour far outweighs the words of self-optimism, authentic praise or realistic compliments that we spontaneously endorse. Comforting self-talk is a vital part of every successful person’s daily routine. Therefore, why do we become so mean about frequently and eagerly applying this to ourselves?

Most of us would agree with the well-known philanthropist Dale Carnegie who wisely shared; “People who are unable to motivate themselves must be content with mediocrity.” As humans, the desire to improve ourselves and want for a better life is wired into our genes. Our environment and at times, other people, can motivate us to reach out for a better life. With every choice, either positive or negative, we train our brains to assist and support us. When we change our perceptions and allow ourselves to believe in the changes, our brain automatically responds.

Imagine that your boss, whom you rarely see, randomly calls you into the office for a chat.   At this point you have two options, to give yourself some words of comfort, or to succumb to self-doubt and insecurity. More often, thoughts and images of what you have done wrong immediately come to mind. Your heart is racing, You recall several staff members being laid off recently and frantically try to think up some creative things to say. However, when you speak to the boss, you discover that the meeting was called to give you some positive feedback about a new team member’s experience.

So what is it that makes us all jump to the conclusion that something must be wrong? We all do it. When faced with a problem that is seemingly beyond our control, most of us are sure to feel helpless. It would be far more valuable to make a previous decision to choose a cheerful approach and have some positive words or scripts at hand to apply whenever our uncertainty appears. Effectiveness is a habit, one that must be practised regularly. Just repeating the simple phrase “I love a challenge” makes a huge difference when facing real concerns.

Every time we have an incident to experience a drawback, we also find the occasion to discover a truth about our inner strength, resilience and emotional courage. Opportunities are always available. We all know many soothing words to help us feel comfortable and safe. We must begin to use them by making good choices which lead us to satisfying results. It is possible to turn a stressful situation into an inspiring learning experience.

Below are some amazing affirmations from the work of Dr John Demartini.    Keep these ideas close by for days when your positivity seems a little out of reach.

  • When I accept responsibility for my daily experiences, I open my heart to guidance from my inner voice.
  • I am willing to accept the benefits and drawbacks of moving towards my goals.
  • I am as worthy as I believe I am and nobody can put me down or lift me up any further than I put myself down or lift myself up.
  • When I permit fear to make decisions for me, my self-worth plummets.
  • I have the wisdom and discipline to listen to the guidance of my heart and soul.
  • I am sowing what I love to reap.

By being truly humble and honest with ourselves we unveil our true potential and express our greatest self-worth.  It is so empowering to discover how these strategies help to initiate the life we want. When we are committed to our integrity and our personal philosophy, our self-talk is optimistic and draws great comfort from living with our peaceful heart.

Yours in Therapy.

Jill Bayly.

References.

Demartine, J., (2006) Count Your Blessings. Hay House Inc. Printed in Australia Griffin Press.

Parrott, L., (2007) 3 Seconds. Strand Publishing.Syd. Australia.