As a coach /counsellor I am always looking for new concepts to help my clients lead happier, more meaningful and more productive lives. Learning to become mentally healthy requires that we acquire a few simple consistent skills. Practised daily, as part of your regime, they can uplift our spirits and help us to understand the true meaning of happiness and how it relates to good mental health. These skills are available to everyone.
While nobody can be happy all the time, happiness depends on making choices that improve our mental health. Clients often recall feelings of unhappiness and a desire to change their unpleasant state of mind. In an unhappy state, symptoms occur such as headaches, body pain, fatigue, listlessness, difficulty sleeping, or we may be in argumentative, distant relationships. We neglect to notice how our own behaviour weighs heavily on the people around us. Very often, our close friends protect us by not sharing how this state of being impacts on our relationship with them.
Dr William Glasser (2003), shares how unhappy relationships are primarily the cause of people becoming mentally unwell. “There is ample evidence that psycho-socio-emotional-relationship-life issues play an important part in the creation of mental illness.” Dr Glasser proposes that many people are mentally unhealthy, not mentally ill. As creative, yet unhappy people, we construct physical health disorders and symptoms, for example, depression, anxiety, panic and mania. Left untreated, mental illness will eventually transpire.
It is fair to speculate that most unhappy people would not typically describe themselves as being mentally ill. When mentally healthy people become physically unhealthy, they understand that eating well and exercising are excellent approaches towards doing something to feel better. Yet many people who could be viewed as mentally unhealthy, hold on to their symptoms and believe they are forever trapped, feeling very unwell. The good news is that everyone can make a start on becoming mentally healthier. Happiness and inner peace are available when we do more, care more, and become more passionately involved with whatever fulfils us. Relationships flourish, our focus expands and we begin to make better choices.
Happiness requires us to live in the present moment, to review our uniqueness and become aware of the choices we make on a daily basis. Let go of circumstances that belong in the past, exchange them and step into the present. Appreciate that everything we do is a result of a choice. Understand also, that some of our choices are not serving our best interests or supporting our wellbeing or mental health.
Imagine what your life could look like if it had more personal meaning for you. By means of fascination and curiosity, it is possible to go beyond our current life and explore the world. Give yourself permission to switch careers, learn something new or make the time and effort to create a deep loving relationship. Increase daily fun and form relationships where genuine listening and reduced critical communication are all on offer. Let go of the need to control or pressure another person to agree with you.
Ask yourself these questions:
When was the last time I was truly happy?
What do I really want to do?
What do my feelings tell me?
Are my intentions honest?
Mindfulness confirms that we choose much of the unhappiness we suffer. A state of generosity and an open heart helps all fear to slip away, making it easier to reach out to others Enjoy this simple Sanskrit Mantra from Deepak Chopra (2016) “I am drawn into the present moment with ease and joy.”
Great mental health is learning to manage stress, sharing close relationships and successfully managing the ups and downs of daily living. Get back on track, check-in with internal honesty and consider your options. If you are willing to do this, you will surely be on your way to reclaiming and enjoying your peaceful heart.
Yours in Therapy,
Jill Bayly.
References:
https://chopracentermeditation.com/experience#
Glasser, W. (2003) Warning: Psychiatry Can Be Hazardous To Your Mental Health. Harper Collins. New. York.
Very true Jill