As we welcome the arrival of 2018, it is customary to consider fresh resolutions for the year. People speak of doing more; more of this and more of that. We are constantly on the lookout for experiences to expand and develop our lives. All this make me wonder about the concept of less. What if, instead of wanting more, we decided to settle for less?
How would our busy lives look like if we agreed to simplify everything? In the last blog we spoke of people who are thoughtfully selecting an unpretentious life. Settling for less and implementing a healthier lifestyle results in a positive and optimistic future. By accepting responsibility we begin to pay attention to what is most important in our life rather than being seduced by the notion that we never have enough and must work harder to acquire more. Eventually, the escalating stress and imminent pressure of undertaking more, merely converts to making our lives increasingly difficult.
Is it feasible to contemplate areas in your life where the notion of less could be useful? For example, less personal indulgence, less time waste, less food, less pessimism or less temptation. Let us examine a few ideas to embrace the concept of less.
Less bitterness, resentment and critical thinking. Life is short, so why waste time and energy on people who invoke feelings of frustration. Worrying never helps to improve a situation, and the angst it causes will eventually take a toll on your health. Take some quiet time and just let these emotions clear. We may find when we let go of worries, we manage very well without them. The reassuring feeling of peace in being the best we can, will provide us with more confidence and self-reliance.
Less anger, venting and verbalising negative thoughts. Investing time trying to change others is futile. People choose their lifestyle, just as you choose yours. Don’t dwell on perceived slights or disagreements. Analyse the meaning behind disharmony and question one thing you could do differently in a challenging situation. Whatever your circumstances, it is great to feel confident and in control. Experiment with ways to lower your anxiety around other people’s issues. Be kind to family and friends and be willing to see things through a different set of eyes.
Less clutter. Spend time reorganising things. This action provides a space for energy to flow. Tidy homes mean happy thoughts and a peaceful atmosphere. Declutter your home or office regularly. Sorting out odds and ends mean clearing away stagnant energy. Clear clutter in all aspects, for example, anything unfinished in the territory of physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. Both emotional and physical clutter block the pathway towards a peaceful existence. I recommend finding time to read the book Clear Your Clutter by Karen Kingston (1998). You will be inspired by many of Karen’s ideas and her professional wisdom.
Less sitting around. Take time out to walk each day. Moving helps our bodies to function appropriately. Exercise clears the mind and invigorates the body. Walking also permits us to take in a small amount of much required Vitamin D. Spending too much time indoors can mean a deficiency in this nutrient. Walk everywhere that you can, park the car a little further away and walk up the stairs or escalators. Take deep breaths to encourage fresh oxygen to circulate through your whole body. Regular movement provides a sensory experience and offers a valuable way to quiet troubled thoughts. By focusing on the creativeness of Mother Nature, we learn to appreciate our surroundings. A few moments concentrating on nature’s ambiance calms our spirit.
Less sugar, refined foods, alcohol and coffee. Many people use food or drink to deflect unhappiness. When we feel happy, we tend to feel more relaxed and do not require chemical supplements. Take time to read labels as numerous ingredients often provoke trouble. While retraining your taste buds is hard, choosing live, organic food, helps to prevent serious health problems and mental vulnerability. Any chemical dependency becomes problematic and eventually takes a huge toll on the body and our mind. Listen to your body; it speaks to us when we feel overwhelmed, need to drink more water, want to eat, or simply take a rest. Trust what you feel and pay attention to signals. Start with one change to a daily routine and watch it slowly transform your life.
Less Pace. Our commitment to productivity leaves us feeling stressed and frustrated. Be mindful of changes that could be made to allow your efforts to be less complicated. Can you delegate? Do you need all that control? Or is it possible to encourage someone else to take over certain aspects of your business? Our enforced perspectives and self-imposed deadlines are soothed by a realistic approach. Appreciate transformation and make a decision to do things differently. One special photograph or a children’s paintings can evoke pleasant memories and help us to remember a peaceful day. Invent ways to renovate your personal space. Use water or soft music as a reference point to still your mind.
Adapting to adopt a simple life is no easy matter. Searching beyond the temptation of consumerism, we realize we need far less. Although the peace and tranquillity of everyday life may appear far removed from the restlessness of normal existence, by embracing the concept of less, we cultivate inner strength and balance. As we practise letting go, we become more centred and focused. We feel more at peace and fully present and we find joy in a meaningful existence. Besides isn’t it time to truly connect to your peaceful heart?
Yours in therapy,
Jill Bayly
References.
Fairchild,A.,(2015), What To Do When You Don’t Know What To Do. Blue Angel Publishing. Vic. Australia.
Kingston.K.,(1998),Clear Your Clutter. Piatkus Books Limited. London.
Lee. v.,(1998), Quiet Places. Duncan Baird Publishers.Ltd. London.
The first paragraph here got me hooked! Nice article and so true – thanks
Thanks Jill brilliant message and reminder of how we get swept up with consumerism.
Jill
As always you get to the heart of the issues so many of us are dealiing with regularly
Your insights certainly help me put things into perspective
Thanks so much for your perceptive approaches to life today
Love you always
Jamie
Jill you’ve done it again. Just dropping a hint like this gets us looking at our own “wants” . We all have homes full of “stuff” we wanted but really don’t need. Less is more!!! Less “stuff” gives us more time, more enjoyment, and more money to do lovely things like massages, facials etc.
Hi Jill,
I opened your blog this evening aware of the usual anticipation that walks with me each time I receive a blog from you.
Having made multiple changes in my life in recent months which has meant “settling for less” in most areas of my life, I could equate and agree with what the blog suggested regarding pace and clutter. I also totally agreed with the notion of taking better care of my body which, considering it is the only one I will have, made perfect sense to me.
The blog suggested letting go of bitterness, resentment, critical thinking, anger, venting and negative thoughts – a rather tall order for most of the clients we work with and ourselves at times as well. Yet it is one that is long term essential for our well-being and the well-being of our clients.
I found myself thinking about the stories of grief/ loss/tears/fear and the pain that sears the soul that often underpins the expressions of bitterness, resentment, critical thinking, anger, venting and the verbalising of negative thoughts, so often heard in the counselling room and perhaps part of our story as well.
Moving emotionally from these moments of suffering to what was so beautifully described in the blog as “moments of quiet time” often means letting go of the need to be heard and the human need for justice etc …and yet to hold on to these emotions is to risk destruction of our own ability to continue to cope and to function in this world.
Thank you for your blog Jill and for the moments of reflection.
Take care
Eileen